For many trauma survivors, they may notice tension that seems to not have a physical cause, but more of an emotional one. Today, we’ll explore six gentle yoga practices that support softening places in your body that may have been holding onto something, as well as what to do if something arises that feels overwhelming.
Learning how to soften when we constantly brace
Bracing can arise in multiple ways, leading to symptoms that can leave us feeling frustrated, especially if we’re doing all the “right things”. Maybe we feel exhausted even after a full night’s sleep, or have tight shoulders, always clench our jaws, or notice we hold our breath. We might begin to ask how we can soften this and come back to feeling comfort in our bodies.
This can lead us to exploring ways of release that give us results as quickly as possible. How can we quickly “fix” ourselves?
The interesting part of this practice is that the more we try to optimize, control, and perfect, the more we’ll brace. We can’t “hack” our way to more softness. We can only reach this more gentle state if we allow more gentleness.
The six practices below are simply an invitation, not a rigid checklist that must be completed. You don’t need to do them all or feel anything dramatic. Sometimes, just a few moments with your breath or grounding into the support holding you is enough.
A gentle note: sexual trauma survivors may find that certain areas of their body carry more than others. Softening areas may lead to something unexpected arising, and if that happens we’ll explore how to explore this later in this post.
How to begin your practice
Our bodies and nervous systems are highly intelligent. While our symptoms may feel like a disconnect or something has gone wrong, this happens because our bodies will do anything for survival. Bracing and staying alert has kept us safe, despite leaving us in discomfort.
To communicate with our subtle selves and let our bodies know we’re in a supported environment, we’ll find the most benefit from being patient and compassionate. Like falling asleep, we can’t demand sleep to happen. It happens naturally when we set the right conditions, and our bodies sleep when they’re ready.
6 gentle yoga practices to soften and release
I offer a gentle reminder that I offer these practices from a trauma-informed perspective. This means that if at any point something feels like too much, I welcome you to honor this gentle signal from your body. You can take breaks, ease out, or end the practice altogether. You never need to explore more than what feels comfortable.
Before exploring these practices, you might take a moment to arrive in your space. You might notice where your body feels supported against the surface holding you.
1. Gentle breathwork to soothe your nervous system
Supportive for chest tightness, shallow breathing, or a nervous system that’s been running on overdrive.
Note: If breathwork isn’t supportive for you, you’re more than welcome to skip. What is supportive for some people isn’t for all, and that’s entirely okay.
Many of us breathe into our chest when we’re stressed. Overtime, this can lead us to remaining in an alert state. When we breathe into our bellies, we can start to signal safety within our bodies.
Diaphragmatic breath is a gentle exercise you can do anywhere to ground, settle, and feel more supported in your nervous system.
How to explore:
I welcome you to find a comfortable position, either seated or lying down. You might place one hand on your heart and one on your belly if that feels supportive. As you inhale through your nose, I welcome you to let your belly rise first, like a gentle balloon expanding. On your exhale, slowly soften it back down.
I invite you to allow this to feel natural, no need to exert yourself. Even a few rounds of this might welcome a gentle shift.
2. Spinal movement to soften tension
Supportive for bodies that have been braced for a while.
Cat and cow are often taught as a warm-up, but we can learn a lot about ourselves when we slow down and tune into our bodies. If you’re not comfortable tuning in like this, no worries. The movement is always enough.
How to explore:
I welcome you to start in a tabletop position, maybe having your wrist under shoulders, knees under hip points. On your inbreath or as it feels right, you might allow your belly to drop and your heart to open, gazing forward or down, wherever feels best for your neck. On an exhale, or in your time, I invite you to round everything inward, drawing your chin toward your chest, rounding in your upper, middle, and low back. From here, you might alternate between these two shapes.
You may even choose to veer off the path, finding any intuitive movement that might feel supportive. This is just an option if you wish to explore, you can always return to the cat/cow movement.
As you explore this, you might bring awareness to areas like your throat, shoulders, and low back. Nothing to achieve, just noticing what it’s like to move your body in this way.
3. Softening your jaw with your breath
Supportive for jaw tension, headaches.
Note: If breathwork isn’t supportive for you, you’re more than welcome to skip. What is supportive for some people isn’t for all, and that’s entirely okay.
For some of us, we hold so much in our face, especially our jaws. This can happen from holding words or truths back, or just having a stressful day.
Lion’s breath is a playful breathwork practice to soften your jaw if you feel you’ve been clenching.
How to explore:
I welcome you to find a comfortable seat. As you’re ready, you might inhale through your nose. If you’re comfortable, I welcome you to open your mouth, sticking out your tongue toward your chin, and exhale with a gentle ha sound. You can repeat this as much as you like.
This may feel silly or weird if you’ve never explored this. If you’re uncomfortable, I welcome you to pause and honor your limits. You can also release jaw tension from softening your hips, which we’ll explore next.
4. Rest for your hips
Supportive for low back pain, emotional holding.
Our hips are the emotional center of our bodies, and hold feelings of basic safety and support. For survivors of sexual trauma, this area may have a lot of holding. There’s no need to go very deep into hip release, knowing that even a gentle stretch is enough.
Reclined pigeon is a supportive pose to soften your hips.
To begin, I invite you to rest on your back with your feet flat on the mat. As you’re ready, you might cross your right ankle over your left knee, letting your right knee open to the side. If this is enough, you can stay here, or maybe you slowly draw your left leg in toward your chest. You might rest here a few moments, softening in any areas that feel like they could settle – even if just by 1%. No worries if nothing wants to soften, the stretch is enough. When you’re ready, I invite you to gently unwind, release and explore this on the other side.
5. Letting your shoulders grow heavy
Supportive for hunching, neck tension, shoulder tension.
When we wish to protect ourselves, especially our heart space, we round forward, hunching our shoulders toward our ears.
Eagle arms is a supportive stretch that allows a moment of rest.
How to explore:
To begin, I welcome you to extend your arms forward and cross one elbow over the other, wrapping your forearms and bringing your palms to touch if that’s available. You might choose to lift your elbows and draw them away from your face, allowing gentle opening in your upper back and the back of the shoulders. Option here to breathe into the space between your shoulder blades. As you’re ready, I invite you to slowly unwind and explore the other side.
After, you might rest and let your shoulders soften down on an exhale or as you choose.
6. Grounding in your feet
Supportive for moments you may feel ungrounded or disconnected.
Many survivors prefer to live in their heads instead of their bodies. This is another way to feel protected, not a flaw. We can restore gentle grounding by pressing our feet into the floor, creating connection and a supportive, grounding anchor.
Toe squat is a gentle pose that releases your feet and brings awareness to this area, deepening grounding.
How to explore:
I welcome you to start kneeling, maybe placing a blanket under your knees if that’s more supportive. You might choose to curl your toes under so your heels face up, and gently sit back toward your heels. You can stay here if this is enough, or you might sit up fully, knowing you don’t need an intense stretch for this to be supportive.
I welcome you to stay as long as you like, then when you release you might gently tap the tops of your feet on the mat to release.
If something surfaces in your practice
If something arises that ever starts to feel overwhelming, I welcome you to gently pause and return to grounding. This could be noticing your body’s weight on the support holding you, taking a sip of water, placing a blanket over you. Anything that brings you back to the present.
This is why practices like these are always most supportive with resources that create a balanced care plan. Many practices like trauma informed yoga and somatic healing are not meant to be a “cure all” for trauma healing. If you’d like to explore supportive resources to accompany this type of work, I welcome you to learn more on my Survivor Support Page. You are so worthy of support.
Embracing softness over big shifts
In some practices, we might notice a big shift. Other times, we might feel a little lighter, breathe a little easier, or feel the same.
Our bodies are unique, and they tend to find softness slowly, often over many practices. The practice is less about completing a checklist of poses or doing techniques perfectly, and more about creating a gentle environment for any techniques or poses to be more supportive. When we let go of the need to heal overnight, we release the hidden pressure that keeps our bodies bracing.
Instead, when we allow curiosity, compassion, and patience, we learn to meet ourselves where we are. From here, we can learn how to soften, let go of the need to do more and be more, and instead simply be. This lets our nervous systems settle, our thoughts to slow, and to arrive in the current moment. I offer a gentle reminder that this doesn’t require complete stillness, you’re always welcome to fidget in any practice if that feels most supportive in your body.
Our practice becomes a place where we tend to ourselves, honor our limits, reconnect with our inner guidance. It’s slower, softer, and less exciting, but it’s authentic healing that recognizes that healing isn’t a problem that needs correcting, it’s a journey that ebbs and flows. We learn how to be present instead of productive, compassionate instead of judgemental of ourselves. Over time, we learn that our softness wasn’t weakness at all, but our greatest strength.
Beginning your journey to softness after trauma
If this post resonated with you, I invite you to join a free, gentle space that honors softness and healing at your own pace.
Embody and Bloom: The Foundation Series is a free seven-day trauma-informed yoga and somatic healing series for sexual trauma survivors who wish to tend to their nervous systems, reconnect with their bodies, and meet themselves with self compassion.
This series is supportive for all experience levels, including complete beginners, and no props are required. There is nothing you need to change, nothing you need to feel, and no pressure to explore this perfectly. It’s just a gentle place to begin.
I welcome you to join me below.
