We live in a world that constantly battles between self-care culture and hustle culture. This sends a confusing message. How do you know if you’re not spending enough time on self-care, or too much? I invite you to join me in this blog post and explore self-care vs self-indulgence.
What Is Self-Care?
I welcome you to first explore the main definitions of these two terms: self-care vs self-indulgence.
The World Health Organization explains how self care is the ability for someone to care for themselves in order to prevent disease.
Self-care is essentially being able to support your own well being outside of routine medical care. If you’re a trauma survivor, self-care is even more important so you can navigate healing in a way that is healthy and authentic to you.
A few examples of care practices include eating a healthy diet, exercises, reducing stress levels, and proper hygiene.
Many people hear “self-care” and think of baths or luxurious days at the spa. While these are beneficial for health and stress, it’s much more about overall wellness and your daily habits.
Related Post: 8 Areas of Self-Care For Trauma Survivors
What Is Self-Indulgence?
Self indulgence, as defined by Merriam Webster, is: excessive or unrestrained gratification of one’s own appetites, desires, or whims.
Self-indulgence misses the key aspects of self-care. You exclude mindfulness, healthy stress management, and take steps toward lesser wellbeing overtime. These are activities that give you instant gratification and steer you further from physical and mental wellness.
A few examples of unhealthy activities could be overeating, financial splurges, and spending hours on social media.
Major Differences Between Self-Care And Self-Indulgence
With an understanding of both self-care and self-indulgence, let’s explore a few questions to better help you understand which of these categories you’re falling into:
- Is the activity I’m doing benefiting me long term?
- Is this supporting my overall goals of well being and overall health?
- Am I being mindful as I do my activity?
- Is this leading me toward a healthier lifestyle?
- Am I avoiding something else by doing this?
If you answered “yes,” to questions 1-4, it’s likely you’re doing self-care. You may be in self indulgent territory if you answered no. If you answered yes to number 5, it’s possible you’re practicing self-indulgence.
Should You Always Avoid Self-Indulgence?
Part of self-care is allowing yourself to include everything life offers. Just like everything in our lives, moderation is key. If you eat a piece of chocolate after dinner, that could be self-care because you’re not restricting yourself completely to avoid negative feelings. If you were to clear through bags of chocolate because you’re avoiding stress, you may want to explore if there is an underlying reason.
I also invite you to know that sometimes life throws us curve balls and yes, you might slip up and eat an entire bag of chips or chocolate. I welcome you to send yourself as much compassion as you can when this happens, because we all over indulge occasionally.
Recognizing when this happens is also an important step, so you can try something else next time you’re stressed. Creating new habits takes time, so I welcome you to go easy on yourself and honor your victories as they happen.
What If You’re Still Unsure?
You know yourself best, so I welcome you to look at your activities and list the ones you worry may be more indulgent. You might ask yourself the questions I listed in the previous section.
If you’re still unsure, I invite you to try this exercise.
Next time you do the activity you wonder is indulgent, you might take a break in the middle of it for a check in. Are you doing this to avoid anything else? Or are you doing this because you enjoy it and need a rest? Is this something you do in moderation and could maintain a healthy lifestyle if this were to become a healthy habit?
It also may feel indulgent if you never give yourself a break. If that’s the case, you could start small and schedule a few minutes a day or week (any time that works for you) to rest in any way you choose.
Sometimes, overworking yourself allows you to avoid uncomfortable feelings or emotions. On your break, you could see if you’re overworking yourself and if there’s something deeper that might need to be addressed.
I welcome you to explore support options and resources for deeper emotional work, and to explore as many holistic self-care avenues as you choose.
Self-Care vs Self-Indulgence After Trauma
If you’re a trauma survivor, I invite you to do your best to avoid judging yourself if you feel you’re not doing enough or resting too much. If you judge how much rest you crave, I welcome you to take a deep breath and know that it’s okay.
You deserve to rest as much as your body craves, and it’s more important to offer yourself kindness than to throw yourself into overwhelming self-care routines.
Establishing Care Routines That Work For You
Taking care of yourself is beneficial for your mental health and allows you to fill your own cup before your loved ones. The care activities you include will be unique to you and your preferences. I invite you to start small, maybe one new habit per month until you’re ready to add the next.
I invite you to explore the blog posts below for ideas and inspiration:
Related Post: 15 Holistic 5 Minute Self-Care Ideas For Trauma Survivors
Related Post: 15 Easy Rainy Day Self-Care Ideas For Inner Peace
Related Post: 7 Yogi Self-Care Sunday Ideas For Trauma Survivors: Your Done-For-You Schedule
Overview
As you spend more time and attention on creating a healthy self-care plan, I welcome you to take your time when asking, “is this self-care or self indulgence?”
Sometimes the answer isn’t clear until you take a mindful moment and confront any underlying emotions you may be avoiding.
I invite you to take all the time you need as you create a healthy lifestyle, and take care on your self-care journey.
